Imported from the old Mercator Blog (Original Author: Ivan Stefanov)
So that was it. As fast as expected, the last week or so of my student's life flew away. A quick burst of 4 exams, and it is over. Over. Completely - nothing more to do here, everything is finished. At least with Bachelor's education...
It is so easy to count the days - exactly 14 to Check-out day. But there are some other things that are so hard to count - not that it is complex, it is just ... hard. For instance, when you count, you know that there is no time to drink another crate of beer. Or there is no point in buying one more box of pizzas. No more than two chocolates. No use in printing a new book to read. Two or three more laundries. Time - I don't care about it. But all those little signs of life that are flowing through my fingers faster than I can count - this is really getting to me. I can't believe I'm saying it after 3 years of constant, at moments almost unbearable pressure, but it seems that now, when it is all over, is the real time to be strong.
Imported from the old Mercator Blog (Original Author: Ivan Stefanov)
So, it's all over, then? The guided research is - kind of - done, not complete, but done, paper submitted, presentation given, although it passed quite bad... but whatever, it. is. OVER. And with all the courses already passed, as it seems, I am starting to embrace the idea that my days in this university are counted. Hopefully, at least the undergraduate days. I really want it all to be over once and for all - I do not have the nerve to wait for all the grades and stuff, I am so tired of the whole grade business that I just want my diploma in my hands and the long summer rest I have promised myself some 2 years ago.
Today something else occured to me - even if it happens so that I am admitted here and I do not see the last of this university on 6th of June, I will no longer be living on campus. Strange thought. This campus, this college started feeling like home, kind of...
Imported from the old Mercator Blog (Original Author: Ivan Stefanov)
46 hours and counting... down. This is the time remaining to finish my guided research, finish the paper, check it, double check it, drink a glass of cold water to flush away all the bad taste of incompleteness and imperfection and submit the damn thing. One day, when it is long since gone, I am sure I'll be missing dearly these hours of high-strung, nerve-twisting tension... straining your will, or your stubborness, to the very edge, which you never exactly dare to cross.
We are always so afraid of the edges, even when we are constantly moving on them. What lies beyond is scary. Freefall? FREE fall? I wouldn't call it this way - to fall and to be free are contradictory terms in my eyes.
Anyway, one day I'll be missing it all, but right now, in this very moment, I would love 2 hours for myself, sunset at the top of the world, a hammock, and the inevitable cold beer. Or the soft touch of the freshly mown grass under your bare feet on campus green, as hippie as the experience may sound. But bring it on, whatever may come. 46 hours and counting down.